A Long Journey Back

 

Hey everyone! It’s been a long while since my last post, and a lot has changed.  Maybe not on the outside, but definitely some learning on the inside.  This blog will look a little different from what I had first invisioned. While it will still be encouraging and uplifting, it’s also a journey.

I’m still in BC, and enjoying this beautiful life, but I’ve made a few discoveries along the way.  Some habits I thought I had left behind and some realizations that smacked me in the face. The first, and a little secret that apparently only I thought was a secret, was that life will only change if you are intentional about changing it.

When I arrived here, I had BIG plans, big dreams and I was going to revamp a lot in my life to make me a better healthier person.  Sounds good?? Can you see how this might not go exactily how I planned it?

Key word….. plan! I didn’t have one. I had a general idea, but not really a plan. Those who know me well, would say this is not unusual and so far Juanita you are not revamping anything in your life. And they would be right!

I started this blog, and then kinda hit the panic button and thought this needs to go on the back burner and I need to get to work. And then I let fear set in. Now I talk a lot to people about my Faith and being lead by God. And I’m here to say upfront I still panic. I’m not a perfect Chrisitian who has it all together, and doesn’t struggle with fear about the future and how I’m going to pay for things and what direction my life is going in. And if you feel that way too, boy am I glad to meet to you.

When I say I got  to work I mean, I overloaded my schedule. I took my life back into my control. Or so I thought. What I really did was make myself sick… again. I have a history of doing this. I struggle with saying no and trusting what is better. I work to the point of throwing my body, mind and spirit out of anything that could be considered healthy. I don’t eat properly and recovery goes out the window, followed by smart choices and realistic expectations for my best health.

Now why am I telling you all this? Well because when I talk about encouraging others and healing and listening to God, I want you to know I’m still a mess.  My words aren’t coming from some pie in the sky, or some “I know better because I am a Christian who does everything right” ( I would really really like to meet someone who has never done anything wrong and who really has it all together all of the time).

I’m taking this back slide and picking myself up all in stride. On the incredible up side it did not take me long to see the error of my ways ( thank you mom and Kat) for their loving words and swift kick in the butt. You are never too old to take advice from your mom, and trusted family. Keep that in mind.  And keep in mind when you are not following where God is leading and you say you are following and keep hitting walls, it’s time to really open your eyes and question who are you really following??

Until next time, enjoy your day! 😊

Juanita